Love and Relationship Advice Blog

Valentine's Day is coming in just a few days and we want to help you make it your best ever...

Here's how to not only have the best Valentine's Day ever but to take what you do on Valentine's Day and carry it with you throughout the entire year...

Now through Thursday night, February 12, 2010 at 12 midnight Eastern Time, we're going to give you the chance to get your copy of ...

"Susie and Otto Uncensored"

This is the juiciest, sexiest, steamiest, most provocative audio about relationships, intimacy and lovemaking we've ever recorded.

You get to download a copy of it at no charge *if * you are one of the first 400 people to get a copy of our friend and colleague Michael Webb's -----"500 Love Making Tips and Secrets" from THIS link only.

Now for a bit of bad news...

Continue reading "Make This Valentine's Day the Best Ever..." »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

As Valentine's Day approaches, we all know that this is the season of love, right?

Or is it?

The truth is...

For a lot of couples, even though there might be a special dinner, flowers, or a night out together to celebrate (or not)--there's still an underlying tension or distance that seems to always be there.

The fights, arguments and disagreements just seem to erupt out of no where and neither person knows how to stop the pattern.

If you would like to stop fighting and start loving before Valentine's Day, here are 5 ways you're going to love...

These 5 ways to create more love have worked for us and others and we invite you to try them in your relationship right now.

This way, there's more love no matter what time of the year it is...

Continue reading "5 Ways to Stop Fighting and Start Loving Before Valentine's Day" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 03:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

One thing we've discovered about love, relationships, marriage and how to stay in love is...

Great relationships DO NOT happen by accident...

In fact, it's true about not only your relationships, but everything in life...

A great anything does not happen by accident...

Take couples who "fall in love" and "stay in love" for example...

What we've found is that "falling in love" and "staying in love" are two different things.

The falling in love is certainly easier than the staying in love, but for the couples who somehow manage to do both the question is...

How do they do it?

How do these couples seem to beat the odds and do what most couples can't seem to do?

There are several ways that couples keep the fires stoked and burning long after the honeymoon period of the relationship is over.

We're going to share a few of those secrets with you today...

Continue reading "3 Secrets of Couples Who Stay in Love Forever" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 01:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Imagine just for a moment that you are the contestant in
a new TV game show about relationships and we'll be the hosts...

Since you've decided to play along, here's our question for you...

What do you think is the single most important feature desired in a s*e*x*u*a*l or Intimate partner by BOTH men and women?

Is it...

A. Beauty?
B. Intelligence?
C. Status?
Or
D.Something else?

Beauty is a good answer because after all, we ALL want an attractive or good-looking partner, don't we?

Intelligence is a good answer because who doesn't want a partner who is smart, can figure things out and have the intelligence to work with you to create the best life possible for the two of you (and your family, if you have kids.)

Some people might also think status is the most important feature in attracting a relationship partner or in the one you have.

After all, isn't the success you have in life and the future you create for yourself and your family affected greatly by status?

Of course it is...

But when it comes to the #1 single most important feature in a relationship, there is one thing that trumps, beauty, brains, social status and everything else in the desirability area of relationships and attraction.

So, what is it that trumps all the things we just mentioned?

The answer may surprise you...

It certainly surprised us when we first read about this study about what people (and couples) want in relationships...

And it just might have a huge impact on your relationship or your future relationship!

The answer is...(Drum Roll Please) ...

Continue reading "The one thing you must do to insure relationship success..." »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Okay, so I'm the last woman who's a fan of Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight" series to see the movie Twilight, based on her first book.

While it certainly wasn't a "great" film, "Twilight" did bring up a few questions for me...

Do all women want a man who is mesmerized by them like Edward was of Bella?

Do all women secretly want to be swept off their feet, not just once, but continually by a man?

Does fascination for each other have to die as the relationship matures?

Here's a question from one of our readers--and our answer--that speaks to this and much more...

"My hubby once seemed mesmerized by me and my love, my very person, fascinated by my tiny quacks that determine the person that I am. Now he seems threatened, insecure, out to compete with me, or rather what is it that took away my power. I don't seem to get through to him, to tell him about my wants, or how his behavior of
inconsideration makes me feel. And yet he still seems in want of my love and acceptance."

Here are our comments...

Continue reading "Do all women want a man who is mesmerized by them?" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 10:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Do you long for the early days of your relationship when it all seemed more magical? Perhaps you remember the times when your love used to bring you flowers for no reason, write you love poems, or even serenade you with a gushy song. Maybe you wonder what happened to the two of you? Where did your spark and sense of excitement about one another go?

There's a bold-faced lie being spread around that goes something like this: Two people meet. If the chemistry and conditions are favorable, they fall in love. In this “honeymoon phase” they shower one another with adoration and just can't seem to get enough of one another. After time passes in the relationship, the two truly love and care for one another, but that spark and feeling of aliveness slowly dies down. In the best cases, the couple is left in a more “mature” state-- deeply bonded but not very passionate about one another or their relationship.

It truly doesn't have to be that way!

Continue reading "Relationship Advice for Keeping the Spark: Don't Stop Dating Your Mate!" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

We all have our comfort zones when it comes to intimacy with the special someone in our lives. Some couples choose to intimately connect in more traditional ways while others enjoy a wider variety of sensual activities. What do you do when your partner suggests that you two try role playing or fantasy to spice things up? Is this a healthy way to connect?

Our answer to these questions is that role playing and fantasy can most certainly be part of a healthy relationship and can infuse passion and sense of fun into your lovemaking. But only when both partners agree and feel comfortable with the intimate activities and only when the “golden rule” is addressed first.

What's our relationship “golden rule” when it comes to role playing and fantasy? Ask yourself the question: “Does this take me further away from my partner or closer to him or her?” If the intimate activities you are considering feel like they will bring you closer to your love and you are interested in exploring them, go for it! If not, take some time to go within and look at the possible blocks to what's being suggested and talk more about it before making a final decision.

The hit movie “Twilight” about a teenage young woman who falls in love with a vampire has not only enthralled teenage girls, but also (predominantly) women of all ages. The book series and movie centers on the intense romantic relationship between the two main characters: Bella-- a human teenage young woman and Edward-- an oh-so-attractive and chivalrous vampire. It's quite probable that many a woman has imagined the man in her life as Edward while making love or perhaps even asked him to pretend to be a vampire during intimate sharing.

This type of fantasy or role playing may be just what both people in the relationship have been wanting-- a bit of variety and excitement. Many of us played dress up games as children and now, as adults, it can be taken to a different level and shared with your partner. But fantasy and role play really has to be shared and agreed to in order for that “golden rule” to work. Bringing you and your love closer together is the goal and guide.

Since this is "Restart the Spark" month, here are some suggestions for you to consider as you "play" with this idea...

Continue reading "Love Relationships:" Are Role Playing and Fantasy Good Ideas for My Relationship?"" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 07:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Jokes, tales and axioms abound around the topic of lovemaking and just how much men and women tend to avoid truly talking with their mate about it. There are images of women “faking” pleasure in the bedroom and perceptions of men wanting to demonstrate their masculinity during intimacy at all costs. It can all add up to a lot of confusion, misunderstandings and distance in a relationship.

Just how honest do you feel you can be with your partner when it comes to talking about lovemaking? We mean, can you and do you speak with absolute integrity with your love about what you enjoy, what you don't enjoy, how frequently you want to be intimate, how willing you are to experiment, and other topics that can make even the boldest of us shrink away and stumble over our words-- if we speak them at all.

You probably love and trust your partner and share many personal thoughts and ideas with him or her. But the last thing you might want is to embarrass, offend, scare off, or make your mate feel insecure about lovemaking. You may hold back on letting your love know how you really feel about your bedroom interactions because the last thing you want to do is create distance between you two in this most intimate arena.

Unfortunately, when you don't speak honestly with your love about everything in your relationship-- including intimacy-- that avoidance or lack of honesty can create distance far more destructive than the embarrassment that might occur when you do communicate with integrity.

Here's some advice to help you get what you want in the lovemaking department...

Continue reading "Lovemaking Advice: 3 Tips for Communicating What You Want" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 10:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This past weekend, we gave what we think was our best ever presentation on the soul mate spark--how to get it and how to keep it. As we were talking with people from the audience, it was abundantly clear that many had felt the thrill of finding a "soul mate" and only to have the relationship lapse into "ordinary" and full of disagreements.

What we told them was that once you find your soul mate, you can keep the passion and even deepen it throughout the years. Your relationship doesn't have to become empty and lifeless as a lot of long-term relationships seem to be.

One bit of relationship advice is to keep loving with abandon as you did when you were first together.

Even if you have been together for many years, you can go back to that feeling.

Here are a couple of ways you can begin doing that...

Continue reading "Relationship Advice for Keep Love Alive" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Who can forget the lyric "a kiss is just a kiss" from the classic Louis Armstrong song "As Time Goes By." Kissing is something we often associate with those fumbling experiments with romance that may have happened during teen years.

Perhaps sloppy or nervous or even knee-wobbling, that first kiss is probably something you'll never forget. But did you know that even if you and your partner are far past your teen years and you've been together a long time, you can still enjoy the power of a kiss?

In fact, a kiss can be more than "just" a kiss. A kiss can be a key to keeping the connection between you and your love passionate and alive!

Here's what we mean...

Continue reading "Marriage Advice for more Passion, Romance and Fun" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Expressing gratitude and saying thank you is something that many of us were taught to do from a very early age. Coaxing a toddler, then teenager to say “thank you” is a regularly occurring occasion for most parents. It's the polite thing to do, after all, and shows good manners. Once we're adults, saying “thanks” is often not given much thought if we remember to say it at all. In the day to day of your love relationship, gratitude tends to be completely forgotten except for those special favors we ask of each other. Making a habit of offering heartfelt thanks to the one you love can not only make your partner feel appreciated, it can enhance intimacy and bring your closer together.

As unsexy as “thank you” seems, gratitude can put you and your mate on the path to a more passionate relationship. After all, how many times have you and your partner become so busy with your jobs, the kids, the pets, the house and everything else in life that you pretty much only connect when making love? And that might even be fit in rather hurriedly. How much deeper would your intimate connecting be when it's built on a foundation of regularly expressed gratitude that comes with a sense of presence and from the heart?

Continue reading ""Thank" your way to Deeper Intimacy" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 02:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In order to have a red-hot love relationship that is vibrant, alive, sexy, juicy and filled with lots of connection there is one decision that every person and couple must make.

This decision is to individually and together decide what this kind of relationship means to you and then commit with your whole heart, mind and soul to creating this kind of relationship. Refuse to settle for anything less than what you want. Commit to creating and having a passionate, juicy, alive and connected relationship.

Refuse to settle for anything less than the highest vision you have for what you want your love and relationship to be. Commit to always expanding that vision for what you want and finding new ways for expanding and opening to more.

Continue reading "Heating Up Your Love Relationship" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 04:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

We thought we'd heard just about everything until we saw this...

It was an ad for guys about how to seduce the "hottest" women by doing magic tricks.

Now, if you've been reading any of our materials, you know that we are NOT about seduction for the sake of manipulation.

We are about love, juiciness, aliveness, passion and connection.

But after we mulled over this magician's idea, we thought that there was something that we all could learn from it to make our relationships come alive.

Continue reading "Romantic Ideas Using "Magic"" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The other day we were sent a link to a very short video called "How Men Screw Up Romance." In this short video, a beautiful woman walks seductively to a spa-type bathtub and eases herself into the water. As she's enjoying herself in the peace and quiet, a man jumps into the bath, splashing water everywhere, holding his beer. In the next shot, he looks bewildered.

The short film is funny but it's also sad. It's sad because if men just paid attention to what women really want, they could have what they want.

We'll explain...

Continue reading "How Men Screw Up Romance" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 01:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Keeping the spark alive in today's busy world can seem to be an insurmountable problem. Here's a common question that we received and we know that many people share in this woman's frustration--

"We used to have a spark, but after 21 years its now gone. I want to know how to get it back as i don't feel excited any more. How can he want to make love to me and think of me after 21 years?"

Here's a romantic tip, as well as our advice...

Continue reading "A Romantic Idea for Busy Couples" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Although they may not be aware of them, everyone who creates a great relationship has certain things that they do over and over to create more love,passion, connection (or whatever is important to them) on a consistent basis in their relationships.

In any relationship it's usually not just one thing we do that creates the magic but many different things. Sort of like ingredients that go into a recipe for a favorite food or dessert-- if you leave out one of the key ingredients things don't go so well.

So what are the key ingredients in a close, connected and loving relationship?

Continue reading "A Key Ingredient for Creating Close, Connected Relationships" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:16 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Over this past holiday weekend, the two of us took a mini-vacation and drove to Asheville, North Carolina. It was sunny with tempertures in the upper 70's and low 80's. The whole experience was perfect! We spent our time hiking in the mountains and enjoying the great food and shopping in Asheville.

So enough about our perfect weekend--What's the romantic idea that can keep your relationship juicy?

Continue reading "A Romantic Idea for Keeping Your Relationship Juicy" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 03:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Keeping passion and spark in a long-term relationship is a challenge for most couples. Recently we received a series of questions about passion and spark and it's such an important topic that we thought we'd respond on this blog.

Continue reading "Passion in Relationships--A Few Questions about it" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 04:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Romantic Ideas are almost easy to come up with when you simply do this one thing that almost no one does in their relationship...

What most of us do--whether we realize it our not--is to give a gift that we would like rather than what the person who is to receive our gift would like. One of our friends arranged a lovely weekend at a "castle" hotel in a nearby city for her husband as a surprise. The package she bought included massages for each of them and of course, chocolates and champagne.

While all of this might sound really luscious to a lot of us, her husband thought it was a nice gesture but not his style. The woman's daughter even told her that the weekend plans sounded like they were for her rather than what her dad would have liked.

While we certainly think weekend retreats are wonderful, we also recognize that when you are planning your special gift that you invoke the Platinum Rule.

Continue reading "Romantic Ideas for Valentine's Day" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

If you're anything like us, finding that perfect gift for your loved one or significant other can be challenging, to say the least.

You may have challenges coming up with gift ideas that your partner would love and you may also have financial constraints that prevent you from buying the gift you might want to buy. You might also want to be "romantic" but just don't know where to start.

Continue reading "Romantic Gift Ideas for Couples" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 02:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)