If you are like most people, you are unaware of all the moments of automatic choosing that go into your beliefs and your choices all the time, choices that determine the possibilities that will be open or closed to you in your future.

Beliefs can be changed but in order to have something different, you have to do something different. Your current beliefs have created what you have now.

If you want to have a different reality, you have to change your beliefs—and that starts with looking at your thoughts.

Learn to observe yourself and realize that you have the power to alter your perceptions and your reactions—and believe that you can create what you want in your life.

It’s the lack of awareness of our repetitive thoughts and beliefs that cause us to view circumstances as happening to us—that we have no control over.

You can’t have closeness and connection if you feel at the mercy of circumstances or what another person does or doesn’t do. The first step to creating the relationship you want is to become aware of your thoughts and beliefs--especially those that limit you.

Here are some common examples of limiting thoughts and beliefs:

Men are liars, men cheat. Women are cold and frigid. My freedom will be impinged if we become closer. Don’t be affectionate in public. I’ll feel better about myself if I had a hair transplant. I’m over 50 and I can never be attractive again and no one will want me. I’m too old to find love. It’s too late for us. She’ll/he’ll never change. All men are the same. Things will be better if we can just get the kids out of the house. Men don’t listen. Women boss you around. Men aren’t emotional. Women are too emotional. If I open my heart again, I’ll just get hurt.

Here are the 3 biggest and deadliest beliefs that kill relationships and keep love away...

Here's are 4 ways you may be sabotaging love and how you can create exactly what you want...

It's a tale of tragedy, heartbreak and disaster that also has a VERY important relationship lesson in it...

Unfortunately it's a lesson that many couples learn too late.

We hope you never let your relationship get to THIS point, as one couple reported in the midst of a true disaster...

This is one of the big reasons why we're offering our "Get Closer Secrets" teleseminar series and coaching program that starts tonight (on Thursday 1/19)...

We also don't want you to ever have to experience anything like this to save your relationship or marriage

^^^^Here's what happened to this couple trying to save their marriage...

http://www.passionateheart.com/GetCloser/Preview

Whether you're already in a relationship or marriage or you're someone who wants to be--you're definitely going to want to sign up now and here's why...

This is a FREE preview for a new seminar series and coaching program we're going to be doing that starts in just a little over a week from now and this "preview" is going to be awesome.

Here are just a few things we're going to cover in the live preview teleseminar and web audio cast...

You'll Discover: .

~ 4 Keys to "Getting Closer"

~ How you can learn from some of the mistakes we made early in our relationship

~ The one simple decision you can make that virtually guarantees that you and your partner will draw closer to each other

~ How to keep the spark going for as long as you want

~ How to shift "out of gridlock" when upsets and challenges come up in your relationship

~ The big thing most couples stop doing that causes that spark and feeling of closeness and connection to fade away

~ One thing you can start doing immediately to get that feeling of closeness and connection back right away

~ And Much More

If there's one thing we've discovered about love since being together, it's that love, passion and a close connection doesn't have to fade away.

There are things you can do right now to bring you and your partner, spouse or lover closer together. (And yes, one person can make a difference!)

On this call, we're going to teach you 4 of them.

Don't miss this FREE Preview of our upcoming teleseminar series and coaching program.

Sign up now for free for "4 Keys To Getting Closer."

We've got some new things in the works for 2012 that we think you're going to love and as we were thinking about what we wanted to share with you today, we came up with 5 relationship and life tips for you.

We came up with these tips when we asked ourselves this really important question:

What are some things you could start doing (or doing more of) right now that would have an immediate positive impact on your love life, relationships and your happiness in 2012?

It's from this question that we came up with these 5 tips...

Enjoy...

We feel like we have to talk about it anyway.

Not only are some of our friends and coaching clients telling us this but many other people are writing to us about what's going on in their relationships and marriages and often, it's not good.

Many couples are having "melt downs" right now.

Affairs are surfacing, jealousy is rampant, communication is poor and that's not all...

People we know and care about are having serious financial problems.

A friend's marriage is spiraling quickly for divorce after 3 or 4 years of trying everything she could to make it work.

And we could go on but you get the point.

For some couples these melt downs and upsets are creating challenges to the point that makes them even wonder
whether they want to continue in their relationship or not.

From what we can tell by observing the craziness going on all around us and in our own lives right now, melt downs (as we see them) are pretty normal considering the demands and expectations we and most other people put on ourselves during the holidays.

In other words, what might not have been enough to cause a meltdown on a "normal" day, intensifies and becomes a full-blown fight when we are stressed.

You may be noticing something similar happening in your life right now and if it is, we're not surprised.

The question is...

What to do in times like these?

How can you keep your relationship or marriage on solid ground in times of chaos?

How can you stay connected when it's so easy to feel separated, alone and disconnected?

If you're open to them, here are a few suggestions...

It's easy to put everything else you have to do in your life above your relationship. Because after all, your relationship will still be there--right?

Maybe--maybe not.

Our question to you is--why leave it up to chance?

Take some steps now to put some life into your relationship--no matter how good or not-so-good you think it is.

You might believe that change takes a very long time to happen.

You might believe that to change something in your life, you peck away at it and eventually you'll have want you want.

Or you might even believe that change isn't possible.

It's been our experience that change is possible and it happens in two ways:

1. Yes, it can take a long time to happen or

2. You can do things to create what we call "Instant Breakthroughs."

You can create these "instant breakthroughs" in any area of your life but since our focus is relationships...

We'll tell you about some instant breakthroughs that are possible in your relationship.

Before we give you some ideas on how to do this, we'll tell you what "instant relationship breakthroughs" are...

An instant relationship breakthrough is one moment when one or both of you in the relationship make a shift to do, say or act differently and there's an opening, a sense of understanding or a feeling of connection and communion in the relationship that wasn't there previously.

Even for a moment both people feel it.

To give you an idea of what we're talking about, here are 2 "Instant Relationship Breakthroughs" that you can begin practicing right now to make your relationships even better...

When it comes to relationships...

This must be a crazy holiday season for a lot of people because over the last few days we've been deluged by emails and calls for relationship help.

Several people have asked us if we offer on-on-one relationship help in addition to the books and programs we offer...

The answer is YES.

We work with people all over the world by telephone and if you're in our area, we can work with you in person to help you solve whatever relationship challenges are going on in your life.

and here's some good news...

If you want to work with us personally, we have a couple of relationship coaching spots open right now.

To find out more about working with one of us personally or to take the next step, go to

http://www.passionateheart.com/coaching.htm

We know that the holidays are probably pretty busy for you, but in order to have a better, happier experience with the people you love over the next few weeks, how about considering this...

While it's a time to have a lot of things to do and a lot of places to go, it's also time to be in gratitude for the people in your life--especially your intimate and close relationships.

For your relationships to grow deeper in love and connection, gratitude has to be an attitude you carry with you every day.

Gratitude is not only healthy for your relationships but it's healthy for you physically and emotionally.

It's a fact that we've proven over and over in our own lives...

When our thoughts are mostly focused on what we appreciate in ourselves and others, we bring more love, health, prosperity and well-being into our lives.

When our thoughts are mostly focused on what we fear might happen, what upsets us or what went wrong--we bring MORE upset, fear, lack and disconnection into our lives.

So what might hold you back from "being" and expressing gratitude?

If you're as romantically frustrated as most women, you're also not sure what or if there's anything that can be done to make your guy (or the man you want) give you the romance you want.

A lot of women feel that most men are basically clueless about romance and how to be romantic with a woman.

In fact, the majority of our women coaching clients also tell us that even the guys they've been with who seem to be "romantic," stop being that way after the so called "honeymoon period" of their relationship is over.

No matter how true this may seem to be for you in your relationship and life, please know that it doesn't have to be that way and...

If it's this way for you at the moment, then know that it doesn't have to stay this way.

We believe that every guy has an "inner romantic" that's just dying to get out and be released.

What If we could show you a few little known tricks, tactics and ideas for getting your guy to go from being a "Romantic Neanderthal" to a "Romantic Master" who makes you feel like the most important and special woman in the world (without giving yourself away)?

All you have to do is register now for our brand new teleseminar and web audio cast on Thursday, December 1 called "Make Him More Romantic."

The "Make Him More Romantic" teleseminar and web audio cast is THIS Thursday, December 1st at 6PM Pacific / 9 PM Eastern time, will run for about 60 to 70 minutes and you're going to love it.

Everyone who registers will not only be able to listen in live and have the opportunity to submit a question to us about how to make him more romantic--but you'll get a FREE copy of the recording of the event as well.

This means that even if you're busy on Thursday evening and can't listen in live, you should still go ahead and register because you'll get a copy of the recording and won't miss a thing.

We have a very simple belief about love, romance and relationships that is radically different from most people that we hope you'll buy into even a little bit.

If you do, we think it could change your relationships and life forever.

This belief is that love, passion, romance and the spark NEVER has to die in your relationship or marriage.

We believe that there are some very simple things that you can do to keep the love, passion, romance and spark alive forever.

We do these things in our own relationship and in this teleseminar and web audio cast, we're going to do everything in our power to give you the secrets to getting more love and romance in your relationship.

If you're not getting the love and romance you really want, it's time to stop settling for less than you want and less than you deserve in your relationship and life...

... and it's time for you to start getting more of the love, romance and connection that you want. Sign Up Now for "Make Him More Romantic." and discover how.

>>Note: If there's anything you'd like Susie and Otto's help with personally concerning your relationships-- we offer one-on-one coaching both in person and by telephone.

No matter whether you have a good relationship that you want to make great or if you have a few problems, issues or challenges you'd like some help with, we're here for you.

Question...

Did you know that any relationship challenge you'll ever have will come down to a problem with one of these five things?

It's true.

As we've been working with people from all over the world to help them create the lives and relationships they really want--

One thing's clear...

If you don't have the love you want and the kind of relationship you desire...

There's a block in one or more of these areas:

~Your Thoughts

~Your Beliefs

~Your Attitudes

~Your Actions

~ Your Strategies.

That's it.

Everything else is just the details.

You can always trace any challenge back to one of these areas and here's a practical example to illustrate this...

Someone wrote to us recently and asked us...

"How can you stop thinking about the past and only think about the good things you and your partner have now?"

This is an excellent question and one we'll answer in this way...

The person who wrote to us didn't say whether it was 'their' past together or the past before getting together that they couldn't stop thinking negatively about so with that being said...

Here are our thoughts...

Last weekend, when we were planning out next meeting (happens on November 28) in Columbus we came up with the topic for the next meeting and it's ...(be sure to join us if you're in our area)

"I'm Right--You're Right"

Which of course is the exact opposite creed of what most people live by which is "I'm RIGHT--You're WRONG."

We are amazed at how easy it is to fall into the "I'm Right--You're Wrong" trap--and how destructive it is to your relationship when you do!

Recently, one of our coaching clients had a huge awakening around this idea--and the changes he's made because of this awakening are saving his marriage.

Without going into details about his situation, let's just say that the bottom line was that he became so tied up in proving he was "right" every time there was a difference between him and his wife, he kept pushing her further and further away from him.

And that wasn't what he wanted!

In fact, every time they had a difference of opinion, he ended bringing up every "mistake" she'd made in the past and as he put it "hitting below the belt."

They were arguing more often and the more he tried to make himself "right," the more she
withdrew and acted in ways he didn't like.

They were definitely stuck in a damaging loop that they couldn't seem to get out of.

How have they gotten out of this loop to create a much better, happier relationship?

If you can relate in any way to the "I'm Right--You're Wrong" loop, here are some ideas that helped our coaching client make some big changes in his relationship...

How do you feel and express yourself when you get triggered--so that a partner can hear you and not shut down to you.

And here's what's interesting about this...

When you're feeling resistant and "hard" toward your partner, it doesn't lead to more intimacy and the love you want.

It leads to more distance and feelings of aloneness--even when you're in the same bed with your partner.

We can hear what you might be saying right now...

And it might go something like this...

"Okay, Susie and Otto, that's all well and good BUT I'm justified to pull away from my partner because of the way he (she) acts! There's no way I'm opening after what's happened."

If that's what you're thinking, we can certainly sympathize because we've felt exactly that way many times before.

We know we SHOULD open (and things would be a lot better if we did) but if I did, I feel like I'd be giving ME away.

For us (and maybe for you too), it comes down to this question...

"How can we open and soften toward a partner if they've just acted like a jerk or bit_h without losing my power and giving up me?"

Believe us when we say that we've played with this one for quite a few years and here's what we've discovered...

Today, we've released our brand new "Automatic Attraction Secrets" program.

This is truly a breakthrough program because it's the first program of its kind that shows you what to do and how to do it-- to make attracting new love easy, effortless and in fact... Automatic.

We've been working on these new ideas for the past few months and we're really excited to share them with you.

We're so excited to share these new ideas with you about how to "automatically" attract new love into your life that we're making a VERY special offer to you if you get your copy of "Automatic Attraction Secrets" before Wednesday at 12 Midnight Eastern time.

Get your copy of Automatic Attraction Secrets by Wednesday at 12 Midnight Eastern time and you'll be able to come to our special 60 minute teleseminar we're doing on Thursday night at NO Charge.

This special teleseminar will be where we answer 21 of YOUR top questions about attracting and keeping new love in your life.

That's right.... when you order (before Wednesday at 12 Midnight), you'll have the opportunity to submit YOUR most important, pressing and urgent question about how to find, attract and keep new love.

We'll take those questions that we get and give you our personal detailed answer to the 21 top questions during the teleseminar and web cast on Thursday night.

If you have another commitment on Thursday night and can't attend the teleseminar and web cast--don't worry...

We'll record every moment of it and give you access to it as soon as the teleseminar is over.

We invite you to make sure you get our newest and best program we've ever created for finding new love.

We created this program because life is too short to go through it alone and not have the love you want.

Again...

Automatic Attraction Secrets is available today (Monday) October 31st.

New love can be yours and you can attract it quickly, easily and "automatically" if you will only follow the strategies we share in Automatic Attraction Secrets.

Even the toughest, strongest person in a room has got fears of some sort. As you probably already know, your fears can prevent you from doing the things you want to do and from being the person you'd like to be.

It's natural and normal to have some fear.

After all, fear can play a valuable role in alerting you to dangerous situations. Whether it's a dark alley, a lightning storm or cars speeding across a busy highway, fear can amp up endorphins and bring a heightened state of awareness. Fear can urge you to slow down and proceed with caution or fear can impel you to run away from danger.

Fear can also hold you back from what you truly desire.

There's a big difference between a fear response that clues you in to a perilous situation and a fear response that has more to do with the past or particular beliefs than it does with what's actually going on.

In other words, there are times when your fears are why you aren't living the kind of life you want. Your fears could be the main reason why you aren't already with your perfect partner.

The tricky thing about fear is...

You often react in fearful ways without even realizing it. Let's say that you're at a party. You are having a good time chatting, joking and laughing with your friends when you notice someone across the room watching you.

Even though you actually came to the party intending to meet new people and maybe even find someone who is just right for you, you freeze. You quickly look away from the attractive person you just locked eyes with and you move so that you are hidden behind a group of people.

All of this can happen in the matter of a few seconds and you might not even notice what you're doing.

Of course, if there is something that feels creepy or unattractive to you about the person across the room, it's understandable that you might break off the visual connection that was just made. However, too many times, people brush up against (literally or figuratively) a potentially perfect partner and they run away fast.

As we said, this is often unconscious and it's almost always due to fear.

If you can relate, here are some ideas to help you deal with this fear...

This is a question that one of our newsletter subscribers asked us recently and we think it's a question that many people face in their lives.

Earlier this summer, Otto tried to start our lawn mower and it wouldn't start. He pulled on the starter rope over and
over and when the mower finally did start, it ran about 30 seconds and then quit. He was frustrated to say the least!

Finally he decided to empty the gasoline that had been in the mower for a few weeks and buy new gas.

The result was amazing. It was just like going to the store and buying a new lawn mower! It started the very first time after the fresh gasoline was put in the mower.

This is what happens in our relationships. When our relationships are new and fresh, we give them plenty of attention and "fuel." But over time, we don't give our relationships the attention or "fuel" they need to stay strong, alive and vibrant.

In our opinion, there are several reasons why relationships "sour." We can't address all of them in this article but we can give you a few ideas and examples...