Love and Relationship Advice Blog

We saw the movie "Knocked Up" over the weekend and totally agreed with the reviewers that it was funny and worth seeing. There were so many observations that we could make about relationships and if you've seen it, we're sure that you have plenty of your own.

One of our teachers said it this way--"Men marry women hoping they don't change; Women marry men hoping they do"--and that's one of the big themes in "Knocked Up."

It goes something like this--Can the guy who doesn't hold a job, smokes dope and seems really irresponsible become responsible enough to become a good partner and parent? Can women change men and if men do change, are they happy?

So what about trying to change your partner? Can you do it and is it worth it if you do?

Continue reading "Relationship Advice from the "Knocked Up" movie" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This week, someone asked Susie such an interesting relationship question that we thought we'd share our thoughts about the topic with you.

This question and our answer are important to anyone who wants more love and connection in their relationships and life.

So what is the question we're talking about?

Susie and her sister were having a "girls getaway," visiting their two cousins who live in Richmond, Virginia, which is about an 7 hour drive from where we live in Ohio.

The four of them grew up together and have been very close friends since. They always have such a good time at these "reunions" and one of the fun things the four of them did in the evenings during this reunion was watch romantic comedy movies on DVD and laugh together.

You know the way romantic comedies go... there are always bizarre twists and turns on the way to getting the guy or girl of your dreams and the movies that the four of them watched were no different.

In fact, in two of these movies, the couples met and fell "in love" within a week.

As the four of them talked about the movies later, Susie's sister asked if it was really possible to fall in that kind of love in a week. Susie thought that was an interesting question because that's exactly what happened to the two of us.

Continue reading "Relationship Advice for After You Meet Your Soul Mate" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 10:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In order to have a red-hot love relationship that is vibrant, alive, sexy, juicy and filled with lots of connection there is one decision that every person and couple must make.

This decision is to individually and together decide what this kind of relationship means to you and then commit with your whole heart, mind and soul to creating this kind of relationship. Refuse to settle for anything less than what you want. Commit to creating and having a passionate, juicy, alive and connected relationship.

Refuse to settle for anything less than the highest vision you have for what you want your love and relationship to be. Commit to always expanding that vision for what you want and finding new ways for expanding and opening to more.

Continue reading "Heating Up Your Love Relationship" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 04:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

We thought we'd heard just about everything until we saw this...

It was an ad for guys about how to seduce the "hottest" women by doing magic tricks.

Now, if you've been reading any of our materials, you know that we are NOT about seduction for the sake of manipulation.

We are about love, juiciness, aliveness, passion and connection.

But after we mulled over this magician's idea, we thought that there was something that we all could learn from it to make our relationships come alive.

Continue reading "Romantic Ideas Using "Magic"" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Whether we know it our not--we all want to connect deeper with someone or something. We might connect with animals instead of people but we all feel better when we are connected.

In committed relationships, that connection that we may have felt in the beginning of our relationship may come and go--and when it goes, we really feel it.

Here's a question along those lines from a woman...

"I have a question. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 4 years. We were engaged but recently we have been having some problems. He says that he doesn't feel a connection to me anymore, but he wants to work on getting the connection back. How do you go about getting the connection back in your relationship? I still love him more than anything in the world, he is the one who's feeling unsure about our relationship."

Connection is something that we can take for granted until we feel its absence. Here are a few suggestions for getting a connection back...

Continue reading "Relationship Advice for Connecting Deeper" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The other day we were sent a link to a very short video called "How Men Screw Up Romance." In this short video, a beautiful woman walks seductively to a spa-type bathtub and eases herself into the water. As she's enjoying herself in the peace and quiet, a man jumps into the bath, splashing water everywhere, holding his beer. In the next shot, he looks bewildered.

The short film is funny but it's also sad. It's sad because if men just paid attention to what women really want, they could have what they want.

We'll explain...

Continue reading "How Men Screw Up Romance" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 01:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Recently, we received a couple of great questions from one of our newsletter subscribers and we thought that the topic raised a challenge that many people seem to have in their relationships.

Here is what the person wrote...

"Is it possible to treat someone too special? Can you give some examples on how to become someone who can attract more love, passion and connection?"

Here's our take on treating someone too special...

Continue reading "Dating and Marriage Advice for a Common Relationship Problem" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Someone came to one of our web sites recently and asked us this question which we thought was thought-provoking enough to warrant an answer in this week's newsletter so everyone could benefit from his question and our answer.

Here's his question...

"I have a friend that flirts with everyone wearing long pants and will kiss friends on the mouths when leaving a party."

He wondered if this was "normal and acceptable."

Here's our response...

Continue reading "Are you a Hugger, A Kisser, A Shaker or A Wisher?" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 03:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In the December 2006 issue of "Performing Songwriter," there's a great interview with Keith Urban of country music fame where he not only talks about his music but also discusses marriage and relationships. Since he did not marry until he was 38 to actress Nicole Kidman, we thought he had some insightful things to say about the institution of marriage.

Continue reading "What You Can Learn from Keith Urban about Marriage and Dating" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 01:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

There seem to be so many mysteries when it comes to dating and one of the big ones is this question...
"Is this the right person for me to spend my life with?"

One of our blog readers wrote this observation and advice and we thought it was a great place to begin talking about this topic...

"I met and married my wife when she was still very young. She was impetuous and somewhat of a spoiled little princess but I had figured she would mature out of it. When she was not throwing a hissy she was a delightful person. Well its 9 years later and the hissies show little sign of abating... well they have mellowed a fractionally but not like I imagined. In retrospect and the advice I will give to my own children is know yourself before you find a mate to spend eternity with. In knowing yourself, you achieve a sense of balance in your own energy and can find a mate not out of need but out of the joy of being with them."

It's common knowledge that most of us are attracted to people who are seemingly our opposites and bring out something in us that we feel is lacking or fills a need in our lives that we have.

While this is a completely "normal" way of choosing a partner, if you're not careful, you can fall into any number of pot holes along the way.

Continue reading "Dating Advice for Choosing the Partner for You" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 04:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

One of our newsletter subscribers asked us recently...

"How can I tell the difference between falling in love with a person's 'potential' and falling in love with someone who I can have a true soul/heart connection with?"

This is such a good question because whether you are single, between relationships or are in a long-term
committed marriage or relationship, this question is one that many people face as they change, grow and move through their lives.

The typical scenario around this topic goes something like this...

Continue reading "Falling in Love with Potential" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 03:39 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Recently we received an interesting question from a guy and we thought that our answer would be helpful to a lot of people in his situation.

In a nutshell, here's what he was asking...

He and his girlfriend were completely in love but last week she started having these doubts about their relationship working out because he was leaving for college across the country. He was confused because it seemd that half of her was trying to convince the other half of her that loved him to break up with him. Her indecisiveness was killing him so he broke up with her. He said that he still loved her but asked how he could forget her.

Here's our answer to him and to anyone in this situation...

Continue reading "Breaking up--Did the Guy Do it Too Quickly?" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Here's a question that we recently received about jealousy and trust...

"I have been seeing someone for a while now, and we both have fallen very fast and very deeply in love with each other. As much as I do trust her, when we were out at the weekend she was rather drunk and ended up talking to a guy outside who kissed her. I thought nothing of this as she did not want or contribute to the kiss though after walking home a bit she told me she had kissed him back for a few seconds and being as drunk as she was, began telling me she was so sorry and she is just a whore.

This I knew was just the drink talking but she went on to say if I had not come out or if I was not there that night she thinks she may have went all the way and slept with him if the chance came up. I know that before we met she had had a rough time and quite simply herself respect was rather low. Trouble is after her saying she does not really trust herself, where does that leave me in trusting her. I have spoken to her and told her she needs to control her drink and she has said she will and that she does know she would not cheat on me.

The problem is still there though, as if she goes out a night with her friends and I'm not there, what happens if the same thing happens and I'm not there? Though the thing I am most worried about is becoming possessive towards her as every time she goes out side to have a cigarette at the pub, how do I know she isn't fooling around?"

Possessiveness or jealousy is certainly not the route to take and this person who asked this question is certainly wise to not want to go down it. With that being said, what does he do in this situation?

Continue reading "Jealousy and Trust: How do you know when to trust?" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Here's a fascinating question that we received from one of our newsletter subscribers and we are fairly certain that the question has come up for many other people in their relationships.

Our subscriber asked...

"Can you say 'I love you' too much? How can I make my partner believe that you can not overuse the 'I love you' term. He says if we say it too often, it will become meaningless."

We've heard this question more than once and our answer may surprise you...

Continue reading "Can You Say 'I Love You' TOO Much?" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 11:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

One thing is for sure--Dating can be scary, unknown territory, especially in midlife, after the age of 50. I was divorced in my 30th year of marriage and I know that I had no clue what was happening on the senior dating scene or even how to go about it.

For Otto and me, our love happened quickly and I wasn't ever actually on the dating scene--and we have been very happy together ever since. But in our years of coaching many people who find themselves either single again in their 40's or 50's or considering the possibility, we have come to some observations about the topic of what might be considered senior dating.

Continue reading "Senior Dating: Some Inside Tips to Help You on Your Way" »

Posted by Susie and Otto Collins at 12:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)