We just released a brand new program called "Magic Relationship Words That Wake Up Desire" that is a must have for anyone who wants more spark in their relationship.

This is the 2nd "Magic Words" program we've created to date and what's unique about this one is it focuses specifically on how you can create more passion in a spouse, partner or lover.

What's amazing about this program is how quickly and easily it is to wake up desire in your relationship just by using a few "magic words" instead of the words you normally use that are not so magical.

What if it really could be this easy to wake up desire?

Go check out this new "Magic Words That Wake Up Desire" program now...

In this video you're going to learn

The #1 reason for Break Ups, Separation and Divorces...

How to predict a break up or divorce...

Why passion dies...

How to tell if your relationship will survive...

How to say "No" in the bedroom without Bruising Your Partner's Ego...

AND how to keep the spark alive forever in a relationship.

We'll let you know when the video is available. (should be in a couple of days.)

Now, we want to talk to you about...

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5 relationship tricks that make love stick...

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The other day, a man asked us for more information about our book and audio program "Should You Stay or Should You go?"

As we talked to him, he told us that he really didn't want to leave his relationship but he was having a difficult time finding ways to revive the love they once had.

He asked us if we knew any "tricks" that he could use to help him fall back in love.

While we wouldn't classify these ideas we're about to share with you as "tricks"or "magic dust"...

What we will tell you is if you consistently do these 5 things we're going to talk about, you'll create a better, more caring and more loving relationship that can truly last.

Here are 5 relationship tricks that make love stick...

While we're definitely in favor of be authentic, real and telling your truth, often what passes as "truth" in relationships is just plain meanness.

It's like when you get together in a relationship, after a few years, you get a "I-can-treat-you-as-bad-as-I-want-to-treat-you" card.

(We know because we certainly used to play this card in previous relationships!)

If you're tired, you take it out on your partner.

If you're angry at someone else, you take it out on your partner.

Here's what makes love stick...

**If you are feeling squirrelly, angry, tired, upset, let your partner know what's going on with you--but don't take it out on him or her.

Something like--"I'm feeling really upset right now with ______ and I'd just like some time alone. Thanks for understanding"--keeps your connection.

2. Be willing to be vulnerable even if you've been hurt in the past.

When you've been hurt in the past, it's certainly natural for you to put your guard up, close down and not let others in.

The only problem is that love happens when you're letting the other person glimpse who you really are.

**There is a way to speak your truth and still have boundaries--and one of the "tricks" is to know that you always have choice.

If you have trouble opening yourself up and want some help in speaking your truth, especially when it's difficult to do so, we suggest getting our "Stop Talking on Eggshells."

3. Practice staying open to connection even when you're triggered

We all get triggered when someone, especially those closest to us, says or does something that we disagree with, don't like or goes against what WE believe is right.

And we react in a number of ways that push others away and kill relationships.

In order to make love stick (and stay), you have to practice stopping yourself from your habitual reactions that cut your connection.

**The "trick" is to find out what you do when you're triggered--and pause before you do it.

We've seen many couples regain their love and connection by simply practicing this one "trick."

If it can work for them, it can work for you too!

4. Stop the stories about what something does or doesn't mean.

As humans, we all love a good story--and we're oh so good at making them up, especially when we don't have all the facts!

Story telling (aka making assumptions) can be one of the biggest reasons that love fades and dies.

If I'm making assumptions about your intentions for saying or doing something without clarifying any questions I have with you, I'm making up a story that may or may not have any truth to it.

And I'm reacting to my story about you without you even realizing what my story is!

Talk about a way to "unstick" love--this is one of the best.

**When you recognize that you've made up a story, just ask for clarification. (Yes, it's that easy.)

5. Look for the positive and what you appreciate about your partner

The motivational speaker Zig Ziggler once said...

"Whatever you put into your mind is going to come out."

If you're focusing on what's wrong with your partner, that's what you'll get more of.

We certainly don't mean to paint a "happy face" on your situation or your partner if you're being treated badly.

Look at your relationship and your partner as it is but not worse than it is.

This is one of the biggest ways to rebuild trust that we talk about in our "Relationship Trust
Turnaround."

Whether you're rebuilding trust or just amping upthe love and passion in your relationship, use these 5 "tricks" (that really aren't tricks at all) to create the kind of relationship that you want.

It's very steamy.

And because our mission is to help you create amazing, lasting love without losing yourself, this project fits right in!

(BTW, if you haven't gotten our "Magic Relationship Words" yet and you need some help in the communication department, be sure to check it out.

We strongly believe that reigniting passion and intimacy in a relationship is a path to lasting love--and the words you use, as well as your intention behind those words, can certainly smooth the path to renewed excitement and connection.

Here's one of those phrases that we've discovered that increases intimacy...

This is a great question to open a dialogue that will help the two of you to "get on the same page" when a situation comes up that could be contentious or to encourage you each to share your ideas so that you can come up with a solution that you both can buy into.

Instead of holding back and not addressing a situation, this phrase opens up a way for two people to explore what's possible.

Several years ago, Otto and I asked this question in
this way...

"How can we get everything done we need to get done in our busy lives and still have time for a hot, juicy love life?

Since we both wanted to keep our spark alive and growing, we came up with a plan to use the first hour when we
wake up each morning as our love-making, connection time and although we haven't been "perfect" at it, we do
honor this commitment most every morning.

Another couple was finding that their sex life had faded in a large part because they were spending most of their free time with their kids in their activities.

Their question was this--"How can we still be great parents AND support our kids and also find the time and the energy to make love and enjoy each other sexually on a regular basis?"

They discovered that they could miss some practices when their kids played sports. They arranged car-pooling with a neighbor and used that time every other Saturday for their special time together.

Although it wasn't a perfect arrangement (they would have liked it to be more often), it was better than nothing.

By dedicating this time and space for sexuality, they were rekindling their flame.

Using this phrase "How can we ________" is also a safe way to talk about the touchy subject of differences in sexual needs.

If you bring up a topic in this way, there's a specific goal in mind and there's space for each person to give ideas.

It certainly builds trust and connection when you allow each person's ideas to be part of a solutions list without immediately disqualifying them or making the other wrong.

Each person feels heard if you follow this "rule" and then together, you can talk about what are the most doable solutions.

Our advice--If there's an elephant in the room (no matter what it looks like), it's a barrier to connection and intimacy. Take the courage and open a discussion about how the two of you can "get on the same page" and find some solutions.

Remember, what you fear is often so much bigger in your imagination than what is truly there.

Stop fearing and start connecting.

"What happened to the man/woman I used to be with?"

You feel like you've been blind-sided in your relationship and you don't know what happened.

Read one woman's question who purchased our "Automatic Attraction Secrets" program and our answer if this has ever been (or is now) your question as well...

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Question from a subscriber:
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"Dear Susie and Otto,

"I listened to the first audio file about automatic attraction. What I am surprised about so far is a fact that seems
so important to me and that is that for me anyway, and I think for many, many people is that a strong physical
attraction between two people is what brings them together, and after 6 months of mad passionate love making then the two people are deeply intertwined.

"Then after that time period or maybe longer or shorter?? then we discover what the person is really like, (emotionally unavailable, can not communicate, is cheap with money, whatever the problem may be).

"But in the beginning, we do NOT KNOW THESE THINGS....and that is why the only relationships that seem to WORK
are those that begin as friendships.

"I know there are exceptions to this as well. but how is one to know when the two people in the beginning are feeling 'so in love' that they only put their best foot forward ...none of this was discussed even during that first audio...What are your thoughts on this?"

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Our Answer...
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You make a really important point and it's a great question--one that we love to talk about quite a lot...

After the "honeymoon" period of a relationship, then what? How do you keep the spark alive even when you wonder who this stranger is that you're with.

This is true whether you started out as friends or not.

In fact, one of our teachers Michele Weiner Davis created what she called the "Marriage map" and calls this stage
the "What was I thinking" stage of the relationship.

And then that's followed by "Everything would be great if YOU changed" stage.

It's what you do at this critical stage of a relationship that determines whether your relationship lasts and grows or if you both become numb and possibly end your relationship.

The magic comes when you decide to learn from your differences, listen closely to yourself and to your partner,
and not get pulled into old destructive patterns so you can find a loving way to be together--and grow together.

Of course, you can find that you've made a big mistake and find out that someone is absolutely not the person you thought.

The idea is to keep your eyes open and pay attention to red flags--before you commit. And if you've already ignored those red flags for way too long, turn around and really look at them-- taking action if necessary.

The important thing to remember is that you WILL push each other's buttons and to choose someone who is open to taking responsibility for his or her actions and for listening to you to find solutions to problems and misunderstandings that are created.

Here are a few ideas to keep in mind whether you're currently in a relationship or not when you hit that point where you're rubbing each other the wrong way and can't seem to get on the same page...

1. Learn to soothe yourself when you get triggered

Learning how to stop your habitual reaction when you're triggered is probably one of the most important relationship skills you can learn.

Even if your partner gets triggered and defensive, if you learn how to stop yourself from doing whatever you do to escalate the situation or disagreement, while not giving yourself away or being a doormat, you will take a powerful step to learning how to be together as a couple.

There are many techniques you can use and focusing on your breath is a very powerful one.

Another technique is to simply feel your feet underneath you while breathing into your body.

Whatever you choose to practice, start today finding a way to calm yourself so that you can clearly speak what's in your heart and listen as well.

2. Look at your beliefs and your focus

Is your primary focus on what your partner is doing wrong or is it on what's going right?

We, of course, don't suggest pretending a situation is anything other than what it is or turning a blind eye on what's going on in front of you.

What we are saying is that getting into a negative loop is REALLY easy, especially at the stage in a relationship where you're waking up and saying, "Who is this person I'm in a relationship with?"

So step back and see if your entire focus has become what he or she is doing wrong rather on what's going right.

3. Ask yourself what can you learn from your partner

This can really be tricky in a lot of ways--but when you can actually see what you can learn from your partner when there's a disagreement, your relationship gets so much richer.

We sometimes ask ourselves ask ourselves how we might be contributing to a certain situation that is triggering us
and upsetting us-and that's certainly not to take on blame but rather to help understand the situation better.

For instance, if you feel that your partner is emotionally unavailable, you might ask yourself when you might have been emotionally unavailable or how your actions might appear that way.

If you bypass the guilt and blame, you can usually find some way that your actions might have been perceived
that way. Then you're not so quick to sling accusations at someone else but rather talk about how the two of you
can feel closer.

Sometimes it can be the smallest thing, like an assumption about what someone said. They might have said one thing and you "thought" they meant something totally different.

Sometimes people in relationships "hold back" and do what we call "talk on eggshells" and make up meanings that really aren't there.

Other times, it's fear that keeps you from saying what you think or from speaking our truth.

If you're someone who holds back and doesn't always say what's on your mind, we recommend you download our
"Stop Talking On Eggshells" program.

One other important point: In our opinion, the goal should always be to keep the love, passion and spark alive in your relationship forever.

We all have different versions in our heads about what that should look like and that's what makes the world go round.

Our advice is to NOT be willing to settle for less than your vision of what you want, ever.

You can always find a way to create the love you want if you're committed.

This is truly tragic when it's possible to give our partner or lover something everyone wants but we hold back and don't give it to them.

So, what is it that we ALL want that we don't often get?

Some people think it's love we're talking about here and yes, we all want love but there's something else we ALL want that we'll do almost anything for...

It's what Tony Robbins calls the desire for significance and we all want to feel significant in some way, whether we realize it or not.

Said another way (as it relates to our love relationships)...One of the things we most want in the world is to feel "special," "of value" and "important" to a significant other.

The fact is that we do all kinds of bizarre things we may not ordinarily do (to feel significant) if we weren't trying to get love and get the feelings of being wanted and desired.

We could go on and on and give you example after example of things our coaching clients have told us (both healthy and unhealthy) that they've done for love but what you're probably wondering is...

What's the lesson here and how can you use this to make your relationship great or at least a whole lot better than it is right now?

It's simple...

Then treat them that way.

That's what we try to do and we keep getting better and better at it.

Treating other people special and like they're important is such a simple concept but people miss this idea somehow.

The question we like to ask a lot is...

"Will saying this, doing this or acting in this way bring me more love and connection or less?"

When Otto tells Susie how sexy he thinks she is... she loves it and is more open to what he wants when she feels good.

When Susie tells Otto how much she appreciates him--he loves it and is a whole lot kinder than he might be if she didn't appreciate him.

This can also backfire on you though...

Some people think that if they use Magic Words--like "You're so important to me" or "I love you" and some of the creative ones we have in our "Magic Relationship Words" book without following through on actions that demonstrate those sentiments, it'll be "okay" and they can get what they want.

Well it usually doesn't work that way. In fact, if empty words are said repeatedly, trust is broken and at some point, it can't be repaired.

So it's important to appreciate and convey that your significant other is important to you with words as well as actions that show this love and respect.

If Otto tells Susie how sexy she is but spends his time when they're out staring at beautiful, sexy women and commenting on their attributes--his words seem hollow to Susie.

If Susie tells Otto how much she appreciates him but constantly criticizes him and tears him down, especially in front of others, all of the good feelings from her appreciation of him are negated.

So this week, we invite you to not only use your words to appreciate your partner but also show him or her how important they are to you with your actions.

If you are like most people, you are unaware of all the moments of automatic choosing that go into your beliefs and your choices all the time, choices that determine the possibilities that will be open or closed to you in your future.

Beliefs can be changed but in order to have something different, you have to do something different. Your current beliefs have created what you have now.

If you want to have a different reality, you have to change your beliefs—and that starts with looking at your thoughts.

Learn to observe yourself and realize that you have the power to alter your perceptions and your reactions—and believe that you can create what you want in your life.

It’s the lack of awareness of our repetitive thoughts and beliefs that cause us to view circumstances as happening to us—that we have no control over.

You can’t have closeness and connection if you feel at the mercy of circumstances or what another person does or doesn’t do. The first step to creating the relationship you want is to become aware of your thoughts and beliefs--especially those that limit you.

Here are some common examples of limiting thoughts and beliefs:

Men are liars, men cheat. Women are cold and frigid. My freedom will be impinged if we become closer. Don’t be affectionate in public. I’ll feel better about myself if I had a hair transplant. I’m over 50 and I can never be attractive again and no one will want me. I’m too old to find love. It’s too late for us. She’ll/he’ll never change. All men are the same. Things will be better if we can just get the kids out of the house. Men don’t listen. Women boss you around. Men aren’t emotional. Women are too emotional. If I open my heart again, I’ll just get hurt.

Here are the 3 biggest and deadliest beliefs that kill relationships and keep love away...

When you believe that you're not good enough, it seeps into every part of your life, including your relationships. When you believe that you're not good enough, you shrink and don't show up as the full you that you can be. You aren't friendly, you keep to yourself and you limit yourself and what you do. Even if love does find you, you might shove it away because you believe that you don't deserve it.

2."Everyone leaves me"

When you believe that everyone leaves you, you will sabotage every relationship that gets to the commitment stage because underneath, you unconsciously think that it's better to leave first before someone leaves you. This belief is so dangerous because the other person often has no idea that it's happening and wonder how things got so messed up when they seemed to be going so well. You might be equally puzzled why the relationship fell apart as ones before it did.

3. "You should be different"

This belief is a definite killer of relationships and love. The fact is that we're all different and we all come to relationships with our own "rules" and beliefs about how we want our lives and relationships to be. When we close down to listening to how another wants to live-- when we demand that it be "our" way--we shut down our partner and pretty soon resentment creeps in and the arguments and anger start.

If you can identify with any of these, run--don't walk--to becoming aware of how they show up in your relationship. When you think a thought that is similar to any of these beliefs, stop yourself and plant a more empowering thought that will bring you what you want.

Relationships aren't rocket science but they do take nurturing and monitoring our thoughts and actions so that we're moving toward what we want rather than away from what we want.