Renee can't believe she let her friends drag her to this speed date night at a local cafe. Yes, Renee would like to be in a relationship and misses having a special someone to share her life with, but this just seems ridiculous.

After all, how can you find a truly meaningful relationship in a 5 minute interaction? Despite her misgivings about this whole thing, Renee finds herself nervous and feeling self-conscious. What if there actually is a man she's interested in at this event? And, worse yet, what if he doesn't find her attractive or interesting? As she takes a sip of coffee and prepares for the speed dating to begin, Renee's stomach churns.

If you're looking for love, focus more on staying open...

During those few minutes while speed dating, relax and make it your first intention to have a good time. Don't work so hard at “finding” or “looking for” love. Instead, stay open and aware of how you feel when with this person. Perhaps he or she doesn't look like someone you'd expect to date. Or maybe his or her job or life is different than yours and you just can't see yourself with a mate like this.

Try not to close down when finding out information or seeing a face that is not what you think you're looking for. Instead, suspend your judgments for these few minutes. When the mini-date is over, you can decide whether you'd like to get to know even more about this person or if you'll take a pass.

Renee manages to take a deep breath before her first speed date begins. She tries to keep her attention on merely meeting new people rather than finding her Mr. Right. This helps ease her nervousness and takes some pressure off.

Be honest and the fabulous you that you are...

Resist any inclinations to pretend to be anything other than who you are. Perhaps you feel like your life just isn't all that enthralling and you want to spice yourself up with a few exaggerations or fibs. Don't do it! In the movies it may seem easy, fun and impressive to pretend to be a doctor when you're not but is this really how you want to start a potential relationship?

Instead, be honest about who you are and proud too! Of course, nobody likes a braggart, but it's equally a turn off to be with someone who can't stand who he or she is. Before you start a speed date, give yourself a pep talk and celebrate the really unique and great things about you. You don't have to list them off to your date; they will shine through.

Towards the end of the evening, Renee feels tired but also exhilarated. She's actually had fun with this speed dating thing. She met some interesting guys-- even a few she'd like to get to know better-- and she's taken a step toward attracting the relationship she's always wanted.

Relax and have fun whether you choose to speed date or engage in some other form of dating. It's all about getting to know people, letting others know how wonderful you are, and recognizing when you match up with another. Let your feelings be your guide about the level and kind of connection you want with those you are meeting. When you feel great and alive around him or her, that's probably your cue to keep going!

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