The short answer is this...

Unless there's physical or emotional abuse in the relationship and you are endangering your life if you stay, we always suggest that you take some time to discover what you both want in your relationship and if it's possible for you to have that in this relationship.

You may need the help of a therapist or coach to help you sort it all out--whatever support you need, get it. That means both of you need to discover how you've been separating from each other and take responsibility for going for what you want, letting down the walls you've both built.

With that being said, when do you say WHEN if your relaitonship isn't moving toward what you want?

If both of you are truly working on yourselves, part of that "work" should be honesty. And when both of you begin being honest with each other, the truth of when or if to part will become apparent.

If this truth isn't happening between you and one of you wants a different kind of relationship and life than he/she is currently living, the decision becomes obvious when the pain of not living the life you want becomes more than the pain of separating.

It all depends on what you want for your life. While we certainly never suggest people rush into separating before they thoroughly explore the possibilities of their relationship, it's also possible to stay way beyond after the relationship should be dissolved for the growth of both people.

If each of you are moving toward what you both want in your relationship, hang in there and keep opening to each other and acting from who you truly are. If you are moving in different directions, there is no intersection of your wants and needs, it may be time to separate.

Feel into yourself and listen to what you honestly know inside you to be true.